I was surprised when she returned, the bearded-lady. This time, she was hat-less, but her beard was in full force. She came determined to fuck up my Beaumont Sunday and ruin my life, temporarily.
After a much needed pep-talk from Jeff, I came to work determined to be a star employee and carry out my tasks with precision and elegance. With this in mind, I was prepared to tackle the bearded-lady and her issues patiently. However, I was unaware of the 'plague' of annoyance she would distill on the BSI premises that day...
She came with several movers and a large moving truck, reading to move out of her locker permanently. This immediately concerned be as she had moved in barely a month ago. After a few glances in 'her file', it was clear that she was owing a hefty amount of money. I told her she had an outstanding balance and was instructed to pay before preceding to move her belongings. She immediately spat back at me that I was lying and no such amount was to be paid.
After speaking with SB, it was clear. Everything was starting to come to a head and subsequently make sense. The bearded-lady was completely insane. She had moved in the previous Sunday with all her belongings, all of which were infested with cockroaches. After she protested about the faulty charge, I followed her upstairs to her locker where the movers had started to move her out. Within seconds I saw the beige creepy-crawlies coming out of the washing machine door and scurry onto the wall before disappearing in a crack in the wall. I told her she could not leave the premises with her items, since she owed money (due to the necessity of exterminators!). After a few minutes of listening to yelling in Spanish/French, I left the lady and her movers and retreated back downstairs, hoping I wouldn't see an efflux of cockroach-covered boxes and furniture leaving the building.
The lady and her gaggle loitered in the lobby and on the loading dock for some time before the first set of police officers showed up. They barged into the office, perplexed as to why 'this woman cannot access her belongings'. As the police stood wide-eyed at me, waiting for a coherent explanation, I explained simply that the woman is completely crazy and was wasting all of their time. They told me that the bearded-lady had called the police because I had 'kept her from accessing her locker', when really, I simply instructed her that she cannot move out.
An arrangement was quickly made with the woman via my boss and the cops: Clear out all of your nasty shit by 5 pm (17h) and all charges will be revoked. Somehow, the lady understood the demand and, like a cockroach, scampered back upstairs to resume the moving of her belongings.
Several hours passed when 5 pm approached. I was ready to encourage the crazy bitch about her timeliness, when another (different) couple of cops came into the building. Are you kidding me? They explained that, again, a woman was being held back from accessing her items in her locker. I was losing it, laughing in their faces - it must be a joke!
The furry femme came down the stairs up-in-arms about the light above her locker which was turned off, preventing her from successfully getting her stuff out. I told her and the po-po that the light was simply automatic, turning off periodically (which is totally true). The cops and I understood, but the third party did not. In the concrete stairwell, the woman protested whole-heartedly that she had been wronged and that she owed no money and I had insulted her. The cops raised their voices in attempts to calm the woman. When this began I walked away, seeing my assistance was no longer needed.
The day ended at 5:05 pm when the lady left the building, telling me she was done moving out her 'goods'. He locker was to be completely vacant and clean. I went upstairs to see if this was the case, but she somehow decided to put her personal lock back on the door of the completely empty locker. I laughed and watched as a roach ran across the floor and into the adjacent locker.
